This last Sunday we had communion.
The trays get passed around and I scramble to try and ONLY touch one cracker. Failed. Isn’t it funny, maybe it’s just me, but when you try so hard to not touch them all your clumsy fingers grab three!? You quickly drop all in embarrassment. “I’m not a pig! My fingers are just not coordinated to handle the tray, grab one, and pass it on.” So in my quick grab I get a half cracker. Fail.
Getting a broken cracker is like getting a fortune cookie without the fortune(sad example but you know what I mean) Silly me like it’s that important to have a whole-put-together oyster cracker. After all, Jesus body was broken.
Anyways, as I’m looking at my broken cracker I think, “wow that’s like how I am! …broken.”
I sit in the back working the sound system. And as the trays are being passed around, both ushers carrying the juice, passes me by. Fail. I look to my partner in the booth and whisper, “well, I guess we will be healed and not forgiven today”. I know, not funny to say during communion time.
Quick note: We don’t believe the symbols of the Lords body bring healing and forgiveness. It is the symbols of our lords death we do in remembrance.
But, I was trying to make lite of the fact we had been forgotten. No disrespect to our Lord.
The tray of juice eventually gets passed.
I try not to spill it as, like always, it is stuck just ever so slightly in the tray. So, while I am trying not to risk spilling the whole tray and looking at my broken cracker, I’m thinking… “Wow.. I am a mess”
Here I am clumsy, acting out, broken…
I set the two pieces down on the desk top.
The way the light reflects off the juice and the cup. The half broken cracker laying there. And I think…
“Thank you God”
Nothing big and spectacular . I am just thankful. I pray and partake. But, I partake with a thankful heart.
Despite my flaws, He loves me. Despite my sin, He loves me.
That is enough to make my fails…Into something beautiful. I’m healed, forgiven, and redeemed