I will follow…

I heard this song as I was driving this morning. I felt a nudge in my spirit. I have felt this burden on my heart for ministry. A ministry that I keep pushing to the side(for 10 years) And though I am currently in ministry, I feel it is a stepping stone to other things. (not only in my spirit but my husbands as well.) But, having sought the Lord(HARD) the last few weeks, I feel this weighing on my soul more and more. A good weight. Though it feels impossible and big to me…I know if God is calling, He will make a way. I just have to be obedient, trust Him and follow.
This song “I will follow” reminds me of Ruth. Though she could have went back to her people, there was something with Naomi. She, Ruth, knew she needed to be apart of it. Her famous words:
Ruth 1:16 “…For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God.
Karla Hawkins writes for Patheos saying, “…she was blessed by making the most important decision of her life-she chose to follow GOD.”
I am following God. It feels into the unknown. Which is very scary. So I can relate to Ruth here. I know that this next step is “life-altering” but I must! It is a “thing I MUST do” feeling.
I know God is going before me. I have had things prophesied over me in this. Just last week at prayer, God spoke to me through someone, and it was very specific. Also, He spoke through a twitter friend that “I will restore what the locust ate”. They did not even know what I was going through, but that day I had prayed to God to speak through someone. I needed to hear badly at that moment what i needed to do or not do with the some decisions I was making.
So now, God is before me. Like never before.
Often times we don’t realize what that truly means to follow Christ. Or to say to God, “… “If your presence will not go with me, do not bring us up from here. (Exodus 33:15) To say I will not Go UNLESS you go before us or with me. How easily we go about our business traveling from here to there, taking job opportunities, trips, big decision making things…and do not involve God in our final decision. If He is not with us it will fail.
I think about this as I “feel” led to step into this ministry that is “too big” for me. “How could God call me to this?” But, It has not left my mind since 8th grade. I can’t seem to shake it. Though I know if it is God, He will go before me. Then I think about, “What does it truly mean to “follow Christ”?”
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Jesus said:
Matthew 16:24
“Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. 25 For whoever would save his life[g] will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
Again, Karla Hawkins writes, “we also need to love the Lord, exercise self-discipline , and “deny” ourselves anything that would separates us from following Him” If you read this passage in Matthew 16, you see a line of events.
First- The officials demands signs. How often we say to God “show us a sign as to what we need to do” (i am guilty) Do we now know Gods word to know what we are all called to do? Will He not open the doors that need to be opened when His timing is right? Yes we are to “Be ready in season and out of season”. Always ready to give an account of what we beleive and why. Truly that is what Gods word says we should do. So we know what “to do” in life. Yet, we, yes even we who are Christians, want a sign. Like fore some reason if we see the sign we will do it. How wrong our thinking is, because, even when signs were given, Israel still did not listen.
Second- the disciples get confused about bread. Jesus is saying we have to KNOW Gods word. Not what people are telling us. But actually know  Gods word for ourselves. If we know Gods word then we will know what to do. We will know what God can do. We will not be confused as to where we should go, how we will eat, where we need to stay..etc.
Third-Peter sees. After we “get it”, revelations about WHO God is, will help us know, He is there for us. He has a plan and we can trust and lean on Him. No more doubts. No more questions. We are in like mind with the Lord, along with other believers. Unity. One goal..one mission.
Fourth-Privy things. God will reveal His truths to us. He will not leave us in the dark. If we seek Him, he will direct our paths. He will Show us His glory and things to come. Not only for our life but even the lives of those around us. But all for His glory.
Fifth- Back to the cross. It all starts by taking up the cross. Deny our selves deny the world and its lustful pleasures. It is seeking God. Counting the cost. Then we will know who we are in Christ, we will know how and when He will use us. We will be walking in the authority that He said we can walk in.
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When we go through these step God seems to always take us to deeper things. Deeper understanding. A closer walk with Him. We go back to Moses in exodus 33:

17 And the Lord said to Moses, “This very thing that you have spoken I will do, for you have found favor in my sight, and I know you by name.” 18 Moses said, “Please show me your glory.” 19 And he said, “I will make all my goodness pass before you and will proclaim before you my name ‘The Lord.’ And I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy on whom I will show mercy. 20 But,” he said, “you cannot see my face, for man shall not see me and live.” 21 And the Lord said, “Behold, there is a place by me where you shall stand on the rock, 22 and while my glory passes by I will put you in a cleft of the rock, and I will cover you with my hand until I have passed by. 23 Then I will take away my hand, and you shall see my back, but my face shall not be seen.”

This man truly followed the Lord. He found favor in Gods eyes. Few will walk that path. It is a narrow path. I want to go deeper. I know God is calling all of us to a deeper walk with Him. He wants to be intimate with us. Just like Moses He wants to reveal himself to us. He wants to show us that there is more than just going to church. There is a world that is lost and  hungry for the Lord. And God wants to speak through us.
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King Solomon said “its all meaningless” without God. If we truly want to do what God has called us to do we must seek him, deny ourselves, trust and obey…and follow
I will follow,
when you move, I’ll move,
who you love, I’ll love,
who you serve, I’ll serve…
I will follow.
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